Crazy

I did a really brave thing yesterday. I texted Lori asking her for Matt’s number. Then I chickened out a few hours later – before she’d replied – and said never mind. She said she thought it would be cute and I should do it. So I told her to go ahead. Then my stomach started doing flip-flops til I got distracted by other things. Its doing one right now as I'm thinking about what I've started. I assume she texted him, but he never texted her back, as far as I know. (As of 5:30 last night.) For all I know he could have texted her back saying no and she just didn’t text me back because she was afraid of hurting my feelings. At this point, I’ve decided that I’d rather know than not know. Besides, I’m not afraid of rejection. If I get rejected, big deal. I’ll just go find another guy. Clearly I don’t have rejection issues.

I made it through the day yesterday! I had so much going on. I didn’t end up going to my sorority recruitment because I had to print the pieces for my critique today which I’d forgotten about til yesterday. Today is not looking any better than yesterday. In fact I think its worse: I have to put my art up before class actually starts, get a tri-fold poster for my chem presentations, go to an Art Club meeting, go to a Signature Home Collections party, and do my pre-lab homework. I’m going a little bit crazy right now. One step at a time, I keep telling myself, one step at a time. And none of it is stuff I can do right now. I’ve got 11-12 free, 1-2 free and 6-8 free (if I don’t go to the art club meeting or the home collections party). I have no idea how long it will take to put up my art because the one piece is actually lots of little pieces and is going to take some time to get in the right positions. It could take an hour or it could take fifteen minutes. I’m hoping for the fifteen minute one.

I did manage to get my homework done early yesterday, though why I didn’t start doing other stuff I can’t tell you. I wasn’t up past ten doing my homework, though. I know, I go to bed at 10:15 (after the news gets to the weather). It’s a little ridiculous for a college student but in all fairness I get up at 6:50 every morning to work out. I think that justifies the 10:15 bed time. By 10:15 I mean that’s when I start getting ready for bed. By the time I’ve done all that I need to do, it’s usually almost eleven. I could probably look up the weather on the computer and save time by not watching the boring parts of the news but its more fun to hear someone tell me about the weather than to read it on a computer screen. Plus, tv is kind of relaxing. I can just veg for a few minutes while I wait for the weather. Caleb calls this evening process “my ritual” and I suppose it’s a fair name. I do the same things in the same order every night, which is why I always forget to turn the fan on until I’m in bed and have read a few sentences. It isn’t until then that I notice the lack of noise.

I didn’t dream last night, thank God. I probably would be even more crazy than I already am if I’d had another Alex dream.