Overachiever

Explain this to me: My chemistry group does not like me very much. No, they didn’t tell me directly but Amanda is in genetics with most of them and they were talking about me. They were saying things like “She’s such an overachiever” and apparently one kid is trying to compete with me. I didn’t even know he was trying to compete with me. I had no idea. I suppose its good that he’s trying to compete with me. It will help him learn more. But an overachiever? Really? Where do people get off thinking that just because I know the answers I’m an overachiever. How does that logic work? I know the answers so I must have worked really hard to study it? I’m so confused. It’s a phenomenon that has been going on throughout my life. I like to think. I like to have the answers. I like to read. I’m fortunate to be blessed with a good memory so when I read things, I remember them fairly quickly. Does this make me an overachiever? I don’t think so. I think an overachiever is someone who goes above and beyond the required work and spends most of their time trying to get ahead. I don’t go above and beyond the required work. I just do the required work. Does that make me an overachiever? NO. It makes me responsible. I just happen to remember what I learned on the homework, which is the whole purpose of the homework in the first place.

It frustrates me that people make these assumptions about other people. But then again, I do it as well. I assume that if you do the work, you will learn the material. Just because I’m like that, does not mean other people are like that. But because I only know my way of doing things, I assume everyone else’s way is like mine. That’s probably the case in why people call me an overachiever. They assume that because they would have to work really hard to know what I know, I must have worked really hard when its just not the case. Its fascinating to think how your perceptions affect how you see people. Often times I see people who don’t understand as people who didn’t do the work. Sometimes its true, but sometimes its not. I’d like to think that I am nice to the people who have tried and truly don’t understand. I’d like to think that I can answer their questions and help them learn but I’m sure I don’t always come across as approachable. Nobody likes a know-it-all and that’s sometimes the impression that I give.

In elementary school I had the same problem. At recess I would sit on a bench and read; I’ve been able to read since before I started kindergarten. I love reading. The other kids called me Miss Dictionary and Miss Encyclopedia. It bothered me a lot back then because all I really wanted was to make friends and be popular. It did happen (that’s another story). But I never lost the “Miss Dictionary” tag. Its because I read so much. It’s a scientific fact that reading improves your vocabulary and grammar. How can it not? You are deliberately exposing yourself to a wider range of words and increasingly complex sentence structures. According to my mom, I came home from middle school one day and ranted at her about the immaturity of the people in my class. There I was trying to learn and all they could do was make fart jokes. That’s not being an overachiever. Again, that’s being responsible. In high school, I had friends, life was good, and I still didn’t have to pay attention very much in class in order to get an A. Still had the smarty pants label. (Tidbit – One of my favorite pairs of underwear has a turtle with big black glasses, an apple, and a stack of books and says “Smarty Pants”). I was valedictorian of my class. I see how they could misconstrue my actions for being an overachiever.

Maybe my problem with being called an overachiever is because it is inaccurate. I don’t think they mean overachiever when they call me that. I think they are trying to express how irritated they are with me for knowing the answers. It has nothing to do with overachieving anything. It has everything to do with retaining knowledge.

Why do people have to pass judgment on other people? I suppose its in our nature to do so, or maybe its just how we were conditioned to be but its detrimental to world peace, to put it generically. If we’re too busy trying to make ourselves feel superior to those around us, we’re not going to have time to be nice to those people instead. There’s this girl in my chemistry lab. She really rubs me the wrong way. She really rubs almost everybody the wrong way. I feel bad for her. She seems like she has some social issues. I want to reach out to her but I’m limited by the way society would see me if I do. I don’t want to be ostracized like she is. At the same time, I want to do something nice for her. I passed her yesterday on the sidewalk and I smiled at her. I figured, it’s a start. What could it hurt? I don’t know how brave I’ll be when I’m in lab in front of the other people but maybe that smile made her feel a little better about herself or her day. According to Jesus, I should befriend her. She’s probably a lovely person. But I’m too much of a selfish person to do it yet. I’ll just have to content myself with praying for her.

How did she get to be the way she is? Does she know how people react to her? Is she aware of the impression she gives others? I have to think that she is unaware of how other people react to her. Otherwise she is aware and is doing nothing to counteract it. Why would you continue on your path if other people do not like you? I suppose it depends on the person and on who’s doing the liking. I don’t care intellectually that my group thinks I’m an overachiever. I care emotionally though because I want everyone to like me. So is there a reason this girl is not trying? Or is she trying and doesn’t know how to go about doing it?

If I had a superpower it would be the ability to read minds.